Friday, May 23, 2008

Forkboy on A Casa Fox...

There are few restaurants that really rock my world. Nero's Italian, Cafe Charbon, Monica's, and a few others really inspire my taste buds. Not everything is about the food. The atmosphere, the people, the location, etc can really make a place special. Over the weekend in New York City, instead of the old standby Cafe Charbon, The Hazard's introduced me to A Casa Fox. Like Nero's Italian this restaurant made me feel at home, like sitting around my own dining table. I felt just as responsible for the food as the chef did. If the food was not perfect then there was something wrong with me, not the food. The restaurant is tiny, not shocking considering some of the eateries of New York. I once had Pad Thai in a restaurant the size of my bathroom. A Casa Fox is new and the brain child of Melissa Fox, a New York girl with some serious Nicaraguan roots. She is just as cute as a button. Don't let the cuteness fool you. Melissa is one tough cookie. She put that restaurant together herself and when the contractor screwed up the fireplace (I believe he eventually stopped showing up) she added stone and brick masonry to her resume. She rebuilt it herself and it looks beautiful. We walk in and she greets us heartily like she was expecting good friends for dinner. The Hazard's have already been there and she new them by name. 

Atmosphere:
The space is small and cozy. There are two large tables that seat large parties and small tables for that more intimate feel. She does not have her liquor license yet so it is BYOB, which is the best way in my opinion. Mr. Hazard selected two fine bottles from his collection. He handed over the bottle of white wine to chill. That was for the white wine sangria. The sangria is homemade with a "special ingredient." Fresh cut fruit (apples, mangos, etc) were plentiful in each carafe we had. The beverage was the perfect ending to a somewhat stressful afternoon and the perfect beginning to a relaxed and beautiful evening. The tables are set with a bottle of salsa and the silverware is wrapped in traditional red/white or blue/white bandanas (which I could not stop smelling because I could smell the fabric softener!).

The Food:
We began with a few Empanadas ($5 each). I started with a Portobello Mushroom and Smoked Gouda Empanada and it basically melted in my mouth. Her Empanadas are not fried, rather they are baked. I had never had a baked one before and I will probably never have another fried one for as long as I live. Instead of tasting the fried dough, you actually tasted the inside-which is were it counts. The combination of the mushroom and gouda is brilliant. It had just the right amount of cheese. I mean, this ain't a Totino's pizza roll I am talking about-full of grease. In fact there was nothing greasy about it at all. I ended up ordering two more; another Mushroom and Gouda and one Chorizo and Manchego. I am not usually a fan of Chorizo but this one was tasty and not to greasy. I was tempted to try the Black Bean and Queso Blanco but didn’t want to fill up. Served on the table is a wonderful spicy salsa. It was tangy and quite spicy and went well with the Empanadas. After stuffing ourselves with Empanadas, and still enjoying our Sangria, we tried the fried plantain chips with three sauces: fresh guacamole, pico de gallo, and black bean molido. The guacamole and pico were fairly standard but the black beans were excellent. People either screw up black beans by adding too much spice or not enough. This was just right. The plantain chips were thinly sliced and not greasy.

Now it was dinner time.

I cannot believe I kept eating. I ordered the Costillas de Cerdo ($24). It was worth every penny. Pork ribs marinated 24+ hours and slowly braised in their own juices until they become lightly crispy on the outside and tender on the inside. The meat literally fell off the bone. This was served with Spanish fried rice (which apparently looks just like white rice) and black beans in a clay pot. Perfect portions all around. Although I really could have done without the dollop of sour cream on the beans. Mrs. Hazard enjoyed the Pollo Machada ($16) which is shredded herbed chicken and seasonal vegetables marinated in spices and slowly simmered. It to was mighty tasty.

Service:
Our waitress seemed a bit off that evening and kind of slow and clueless. Mainly Ms. Fox was the one who took care of us. She even sat down and shared some wine! Then she brought more wine-it seemed someone couldn’t finish their sangria! We all sat there and talked and enjoyed ourselves. Then she insisted we have desert. So she ordered someone in the back to put an apple crisp in the oven. This was served with crème fraiche. So decadent and tasty it lasted all of about 2 minutes. The bill was paid we got up to leave and she came over to hug our necks. When visiting I recommend you bring an appetite! We left stuffed to the gills.

Bottom line:
I simply cannot wait to return.

Atmosphere: 5.0
Food: 5.0
Service: 4.0 (based on our waitress, not Ms. Fox)
Health Score: Who cares (the place was spotless)

A Casa Fox
173 Orchard Street
New York, NY 10002
212.253.1900

www.acasafox.com

Photo credits: Eric Hazard

New York in Spring...

Isn't there a song about New York City in the spring?  I think there is and if there isn't then there should be.  I just recently was in New York City to visit my friends and fellow BP's The Hazard's.  The weather was absolutely fabulous!  I just could not believe it.  I arrived Friday night, delayed of course.  I walked out of the airport to locate my car service and it was somewhat misting/raining and all I wanted to do was to rip off my glasses but then I would not be able to find my car if it was two inches from me.  I make my way into Manhattan chauffeured in a silver Town Car/Indian restaurant whose special that evening was beef kabobs-heavy on the curry.  The only English I could understand of my turban clad friend was "car 970, cross street, thirty-four dollars."  I lost interest in his musings as we crossed into Manhattan.  That view should be one of the wonders of the world!  When I arrived I declared that I MUST EAT NOW!  The rain had stopped and Ms. Hazard and I walk over to Charlie's Pizza.  Look for a review of Charlie's soon from Forkboy.  

The next morning I awoke from the light of a thousand suns and it was only 5am.  Lying on the sofa I should have brought my sunscreen.  Saturday was such a beautiful day that it would have been a crime to stay inside.  Our purpose that morning was to get ready and head over to a memorial service of a friend who passed away way to soon.  The memorial was very nice and there were a ton of people there.  She will be missed by many and I only wish I had known her more. 

So, afterwards we head back to the apartment to change clothes and head out to an early dinner.  In true Hazard fashion we walked to the East Village.  I am starving and searching out a pretzel with none to be found.  We end up at A Casa Fox, a Nicaraguan restaurant that had recently opened.  It was so fabulous that it is difficult to speak!  Look for a review soon from Forkboy.  Afterward we head over to a friend of the Hazard's for drinks and a courtyard viewing of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

Sunday we head on out to Madison, New Jersey.  We take a train out of Penn Station and honestly I was not all thrilled with the swampy scene.  As we got further from New York the scenery turned lush and green.  Unfortunately it began to rain when we arrived.  What I saw of the town reminded me of my grandparents town in Arkansas.  The quaint little houses, quiet streets, and super lush greenery really took me back to my childhood.  We here there for a BBQ.  Now being from Texas I get a little skeptical of BBQs outside of Texas but Mr. Hazard's friend from South Texas now lives in NJ and had a bunch of mesquite wood shipped to him since you can't get it up there.  He also had cases of Shiner Bock that is apparently almost impossible to find.  The grilled food was so good and the company was even better.  

Now I am back at home.  I go from 60 degree weather to 99 degree weather.  Damn the humidity!!!  

Overall, I had a wonderful time and can't wait to get back there soon.  I think Ron and I will be making a trip up there late summer or early fall.  I ain't going when it is 5 degrees outside again!  

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Texas Polygamist Folks….

With all this talk about the children and mothers.....what I want to know is….where are the men, the father(s)?

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Cooking with Karen...

Damnit!  I am having al kinds of issues posting the Cooking with Karen episode.  I am working to correct this and as soon as I do I will get the damn thing posted.


Tuesday, May 13, 2008

I am headed to New York City on Friday to see my fellow BP's, The Hazard's. I am exicted to get to NYC and see my peeps. Due to the quick planning of this trip I opted to cash in miles instead of paying the rediculous price of $800. Anyway, we will also be attending a memorial service for a fabulous person who left us way to soon. I will be posting more about this trip later.

Sooooo......

Friday morning before my flight I will be doing a real quick Cooking with Karen. I will edit this on the plane and by the end of the day friday there should be a completed version posted. I PROMISE!!! I will be making a nice summer salad that requires no stove and will be easy enough and quick enough to get posted!

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Maury Povich Part II

Ok, I haven't seen another episode of Maury since the last post but a co-worker sent me this video:


Me Talk Pretty...

We all know about the ongoing debate that is illegal immigration but I think she should take a dose of her own meds.  This woman is from Houston, Tx and is obviously wearing a quilt.  She should be deported post haste!!



Sunday, May 4, 2008

Cape Day 2008

Cape Day in Dallas is a large gathering of comic book people, artists, and weirdos.  My friend Jeff asked me to go with him this year.  He was dressing up as Batman and he needed a boy wonder and apparently I am small enough to fit into the costume.  98% of our costumes were made by Jeff and his mother and are incredibly authentic.  I had a blast!  It is amazing what happens when you put on a mask!  





Saturday, May 3, 2008

Cooking with Karen...Test...and Intro

Alright ya'll, tell me what you think about this video.  I added music, credits, and fades!  Next post will be an actual show.  Promise!  I still need to mess around with the editing but I will worry about that later!  Rome wasn't built in a day!

Monday, April 28, 2008

Central Expressway in 1959...

This is Central Expressway in 1959.  Looking south...the building that you see near the top of the picture on the side of Central is The Meadows Building, which is still there today-that is off of Lovers Lane.  That overpass at the bottom is Walnut Hill.  Park Lane is the next overpass and then the cloverleaf overpass is Northwest Highway (which, on the right, would be North Park Mall.



Maury Povich...

Since I took the day off due to exhaustion and a terrible ear issue I have been watching daytime television.  This is something I rarely do but decided to indulge a little.  I allowed myself one show to watch since I needed to get a few things done around the house  and I really did not want to waste brain cells watching a full day of trash tv.  So I chose what was on at the moment...The Maury Show hosted by Maury Povich.  I remember seeing him as the host of A Current Affair.  Maury has also been a news anchor and also served two terms as president of the New York Chapter of the Television Academy.  He has been married to Connie Chung since 1984.  

I would have to say that his show is a higher class version of The Jerry Springer Show.  Mainly he sticks with shows dealing in paternity tests.  He should trade mark the phrases "You are the father" and "You are not the father."  Today's show dealt with the husbands taking a lie detector test to prove they were not cheating.  The last freak show was a couple who married really young (she is 16 and he is 23)-is seems her mama let her marry this dude.  Well she was concerned that he was cheating and he was just saying that she is being paranoid.  In the end, he wasn't cheating but he was concerned that the baby was not his.  BINGO!!  I got a two-for-one this afternoon with this episode.  So they performed a paternity test and yes the baby was his.  I was kinda bummed that they all had a happy ending.  I guess I had already gotten my fix from the previous couple where the lie detector test confirmed that he was having an affair with his wife's mother.  I mean how ghetto fabulous is that?  

I suppose Maury needs to keep working since Connie's career tanked after she interviewed Kathleen Gingrich (Newt's mama) back in the 90's.  You know the interview where she asked her what Hillary was like "off the record and off the camera?"  And ol' Kathy said Hillary was a "bitch."  LOVE it!  Anyway, Maury is bringing home the bacon now.


Camping...

Our camping trip was a success.  The weather was great and our camping spot was isolated and pretty.  Very wooded and a beautiful view of Lake Murray.  

In my personal opinion I believe that there were too many people that went. Overall about 24 people were there.  Parts of the group became a little cliquish which bothered me.  Oh well, I had a good time anyway!

This was also Moses' first real trip.  I was worried at first that he would run off.  I kept the leash on him but then started to feel bad about it.  So I gave him the benefit of the doubt and let him loose.  He went exploring a few times but mainly kept close.  Poor thing, he was so tired toward the end but he hung in there.  He even went for a little swim in the lake.  

Now I am at home not feeling 100%.  I am fairly certain that I have an ear infection and am generally just worn out.  






Thursday, April 24, 2008

Camping...

This weekend we are headed to Lake Murray for the annual (sometimes semi-annual) Out Bitch camping trip. It is called Out Bitch cause it is a bunch of drunken bitchy queens who are trying to out bitch each other. There will be food, fire, and fabulousness. Details to follow on Sunday!

Cooking with Karen...

Ok, I know I have been really bad about not posting any CWK episodes. I am starting to get angry emails and complaints! After doing a few I decided that I needed some equipment-mainly clear glass bowls and a other things to really make CWK better. I have not been happy at all with what I have done thus far. So, I am going to start with incredibly simple dishes. Also, learning iMovie has proved very time consuming. I will post a revised CWK intro that I did a while back. This time there is an into, music, fad-ins, fade-outs, and credits!!! Tell me what ya'll think. I will have that posted this evening sometime so check back!! I promise that I will have a real episode up soon!

Last night's storms....

Here is cool shot of Downtown during last nights storm. The electric storms in Texas are just the best!


Monday, April 21, 2008

Forkboy on Hunky’s…

Saturday evening was full of gayness. We all went and played Gay Bingo at S4. Proceeds benefit the Resource Center which is a great foundation. Anyway, after bingo we were starving and decided to head over to Hunky’s across the street. Hunky’s is located at Throckmorton and Cedar Springs in the heart of the Gayborhood.

Food…
Mainly burgers and sandwiches. I usually get a cheese burger (3.95) with swiss and tator tots (1.55). This visit proved a bit frustrating. The place was really not busy which was surprising on a Saturday night. Our food took forever and my order was wrong. I always order a burger dry no pickles with swiss cheese. This burger had everything on it. I took it back in and the nice lady behind one of the counters took care of it for me. They cooked it immediately as I waited. Once the order was good I devoured the cheese burger. The meat at Hunky’s is ground fresh everyday and patties are all hand-formed. The meat is well seasoned and quite tasty. Of course they used shredded lettuce-which I HATE WITH A PASSION! But I digress. The tots are nice and crispy on the outside and mushy on the inside. The fries are cut thick and are good but I like mine thin and crunchy. You can sit at the bar and eat and watch your milk shake come to life! The shakes and malts are good but for some reason I keep comparing any shake I have to Sonic (best shakes in my opinion).

Service…
You walk in and stand in line and order from the counter. During peak times the line can be slow and basically a cluster *&^%. But everyone is nice.

Atmosphere…
The restaurant resembles a 1950’s era diner. Shiny vinyl booth seats and dark tables. There is a low bar with stools. The kitchen is all open as well. The place is quaint and very bright. There is a patio for outdoor dining. I highly recommend sitting outside. The people watching is great. Bears, trannies, drag queens, etc all walk by headed to the clubs. This is not a place that I love. But if I am in the area I will usually eat there if it isn’t busy.

Food: 2.0
Service: 2.0
Atmosphere: 3.5
Health Score: 90

Hunky’s
4000 Cedar Springs Rd.
Dallas, Tx 75219

www.hunkys.com

Friday, April 18, 2008

There is someone out there for everyone...

And good ol' Tyra Banks has to prove it...

The Barefoot Contessa...

We all know that I love food and I love to cook. Ron has his sports programs and I have my food network. My favorite television food personality is Ina Garten. She is known as The Barefoot Contessa and I simply adore this woman. Watching her show is like taking a chill pill. It totally relaxes me and puts me in such a good mood. It is apparent that she is well balanced and loves her life and her husband of 40+ years. She started out working in the White House as a budget analyst writing the nuclear budget under Ford and Carter. Not surprisingly she got burned out (no pun intended & she even has a pilots license!). Eventually leaving Washington, she purchased a specialty food store called The Barefoot Contessa in Westhampton Beach, New York. To make along story short she ended up selling the store years later (it eventually closed) and then The Food Network came-a-callin. She declined many times but finally caved in and her show is the highest rated on the network. Her show is filmed in her own kitchen in The Hamptons and often features her good (and most fabulously gay) friends.

If you have never seen her on TV then I highly recommend watching. Her cooking style is incredibly elegant and incredibly simple. I like to think of her as my informal mentor in the kitchen.

I came across an article in The New York Times that just make me love her even more:

“Bright-eyed and apple-cheeked,” Garten is enjoying unexpected success in the second half of her life. After 20 years of running a gourmet shop in the Hamptons (named for the Humphrey Bogart/Ava Gardner film The Barefoot Contessa), she sold the store and invested her own money in a cookbook, never expecting it to take off as it has. Now approaching 60, she has five cookbooks, a top-rated show on the Food Network, and a line of prepared foods.
But here’s the great part—Garten has rejected opportunities to expand even more. “She has turned down offers to start magazines or to be host for more TV shows. She has declined to endorse other food products beyond her own line and has rejected opening a chain of food shops.” Garten wants to preserve her quality of life, despite success. “There is a balance between having a life and having a business,” the article quotes her as saying.

That media whore Rachel Ray can suck it!

http://www.barefootcontessa.com/



Weather and TV...



Last night I was so looking forward to a new episode of 30 Rock. But it rained.

The weather reporters must feel that they do not get enough camera time so when it rains they preempt prime time. I think my feelings here can best be summed up from a text message I sent a friend of mine last night:

I hate the God damn weather service interrupting my tv shows! 30 Rock didn’t even show cause David fucking Finfrock had to break in with a “hey everyone…it’s raining” message for two fucking hours and now the fucking satellite is out! I get pissy when I miss my 30 Rock. And for the next three days the news will be nothing but “I lost my barn” stories.

So that was my frustration. Instead we played Wii. However, I will say it was a pretty decent storm and I thought this was a cool picture of what was about to pounce on Dallas:




Thursday, April 17, 2008

Jennifer Garner...

For those of you who know me well you know that I have a borderline unhealthy obsession with Jennifer Garner. Today is her 36th birthday. I love this woman. She is sweet and smokin hot! She kicks major ass in action movies and makes me go gaga in her romantic comedies. And yes, I watched Electra and yes it was bad but I loved it because she was in it. I own the Rambaldi Cube from her show ALIAS and have a Sydney Bristow action figure. I even have her fabulous face decoupaged on a rock. So I just wanted to throw out some birthday lovin to my girl!!! Happy Birthday Jenn!!!!


Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Walking Tour...

I saw something this morning while waiting on my bus downtown that I have never seen in Downtown before….a large group of people taking a historical tour of Downtown Dallas. Being a native Dallasite that made me feel kind of guilty that I have not taken the time to really know the history of the city in which I dwell.

Getting Older...

My grandmother always said that “it is just hell to get old!” Her mind was as sharp as a tack but it was her body that ultimately failed. As I get older I am noticing things about myself that are changing. Some are surprising and some are just down right odd but it is the way the cookie crumbles. I have always thought of myself as a healthy person. I try and eat right and I have never smoked a day in my life. I don’t exercise as much as I should now. I know there are things that I could be doing better and I am working on that.

We all grow older together and as a result things start to happen that we are not always prepared for. A friend in New York is very sick. She had an aneurysm burst and the news is not good. I just think she is simply a fabulous person-so full of life and love and just so much fun. I just think it is unfair that at age 37 this should be happening. My mother recently went through a procedure to repair an aneurysm in her brain. I am certainly thankful that it was caught before any rupture. However, do to the same condition I never got to know my grandfather and my aunt. I love my friends dearly and I know that it is inevitable that situations like this arise. We would all be fools to think that we are invincible. Anything could happen to anyone of us at anytime. I am hopeful that Kellie will pull through and I am hopeful for her husband Ben and all their family and friends.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Happy Old People...

This weekend was the annual Pilsbury Bake-Off and it was held in Downtown Dallas. This was also covered by The Food Network so you know I was keeping up with the goings-on!! I just love to see happy old people, especially when happy old people win one million bucks! So this video clip gave me a warm fuzzy inside! She is just sooo happy!!!!

http://www.dallasnews.com/video/dallasnews/hp/index.html?nvid=236082

The Murse...

I need a new murse. Actually I just really want a new one. I don’t NEED a new one. Generally I purchase a new murse every 18 months or so. What is a murse you ask? Murse = man purse. The murse is also known as a “mag” or “man bag” and can also be referred to as a “mote” or “man tote.” Ron just recently purchased his first murse (although I believe he preferres “mote”). He has started taking DART to work and needed something to carry his stuff in. We found a handsome black and blue mote at Target. It has lots of pockets and is suitable for a lap top. I kinda got a little jealous. I like his mote and we found the same one in all black. I think I just might have to venture out and get it. A murse is great for all occasions especially when traveling and comes in handy for everyday commutes. I highly recommend one!

Monday, April 14, 2008

The 44...

Ron starts a new job today at Perot Systems. Well, not a new job per se…he is going back to Perot. He decided that he wanted to ride DART to work to save money and save gas. I told him that we should do a trial run on the bus that will take him to and from the office. So yesterday we got on the route 44. This is the route for lazy people. We really didn’t notice it on the way up but on the return trip it got annoyingly funny. There was a stop every 5 feet! And there were people at every stop! I was stunned. The ride was stop and start, stop and start. A little ridiculous if you ask me! DART could shave off about 10 minutes on that route if they cut every other stop. Just annoying.

The Homeless Man...

Living downtown certainly has its pros and cons. One of the cons that we must deal with on an almost daily basis is homelessness. Lately it seems to be getting worse. Walking home, walking the dog, sitting on a patio of a café, or just existing in downtown we will all eventually have an encounter with a homeless person. They always ask for money and I always just ignore them and keep on about my business. Usually this is enough and they move on to someone else. There have been times when they become a bit pissy and try and guilt you into giving. Still I just keep on walking, headphones firmly in place.

Lately there has been a homeless man standing in the dark corners of the Dallas Power & Light tower directly across the street from my building. He is, by looks alone, an older black man with a grey beard. Very dirty and smelly. I have seen him many times. I pass by and he says nothing and I say nothing. Just the way it is. When he does speak he simply mutters. Obviously mentally ill and/or drunk-usually both. He has taken to standing in the dark recessed windows of DP&L and masturbates when a woman passes by. You can see it all! People have called the police and yet he still returns. Last night as I was walking Moses out he was sleeping in our lobby. I didn’t say a word to him and just walked out as usual. I called 911 and told them the issue. A policeman came along and removed him. I am not sure what they did with him but he certainly was no longer in our lobby.

I guess I have become immune to all this. I used to worry about them and give them money. But now I just step over them and then take an elevator ride to my luxury loft. I also get pissed when I see other people giving them food and money. It just makes things worse. A solution to keeping the homeless out is about as forthcoming as world peace. Ain’t gonna happen. Sometimes I feel bad and wish they had help. Sometimes I wish they would just disappear.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Forkboy on Dan's...

On the way back to the airport in Austin we stopped and had lunch at Dan's Hamburgers. I was starving so anything sounded good. Dan's is not in a great part of town and the building itself looks like a Dairy Queen. But, the 35 year old restaurant seems to have withstood the test of time. After stepping into the place my first reaction was that this was a former Dairy Queen. Old white tables crammed into what is a decent sized space. All the blinds were drawn so there was this eerie feeling of the place closing in on you. Just odd. We walked up to the cash register to order. The story goes that Dan and his wife Fran worked together until a divorce where she got half of everything and started her own place called Fran’s. Apparently, according to the locals, the food just ain’t the same since the bitter divorce.

Food…
The menu is basic. Mainly burgers. You could order your burger by the size-which I thought was brilliant. Small, medium, or large burgers. I ordered a medium burger, small fries, and an iced tea. The burger was ok, nothing to write home to mamma about. I think it makes great hangover food. The meat was not overcooked but not very seasoned. I had to add lots of salt and pepper. There were plenty of onions and two big slices of tomato. This pleased me. However, I was incredibly annoyed at the shredded lettuce. I HATE shredded lettuce on a hamburger. Just totally pissed me off. The fries were thick cut and fairly good. The best part of the entire experience was the iced tea.

Service…
It helps if you speak Spanish. They seem all friendly but have a blank look on their faces. You order at the window and pick up at another window when they call your number. Listen carefully cause the speaker system is as old as the restaurant.

Atmosphere…
Dark and old feeling. Not inviting at all. All the ultra white table made me feel like I was in a hospital-very sterile feeling. When we pulled up there was an old Town Car with “Jesus is Coming” written all over it. That was the highlight of the dining experience at Dan’s.

Food: 1.5
Service: 1.5
Atmosphere: 1.0
Health Score: 73 (acceptable)

Dan’s
844 Airport Blvd.
Austin, Tx 78702

Forkboy on Rattlesnake Inn...

I flew down to Austin this weekend for a friends birthday. It was decided that we would go to to a hole-in-the-wall place in a town called Florence, Tx(pop. 1080). The place was not as such a dive as I had imagined. It was very open and airy, concrete floors, large garage doors that opened up. There were pool tables and a shuffle board table as well. There are few places I go to that remind me that I am certainly a Texan. Kinda nice to be reminded sometimes. The Rattlesnake Inn opened the day after prohibition ended in 1933. The original building is still standing and there is a new section that was added for expansion.

The food...
They offer a small but diverse menu. Hamburgers, BBQ ribs, pizza, salads, and such. The price is super cheap too. There were 5 of us and I was STUNNED to find out that our bill was $70. After all the beer and ribs we consumed I was amazed at the cost. The burger I had was good size and perfectly cooked medium rare-just like I like it! The bun was sweet bread which seemed odd at first but I love sweet bread. I was very disappointed to see shredded lettuce on my burger. I HATE that!!! I prefer a whole piece of lettuce. So the meal was very messy since they piled it on. Overall the burger was fantastic-one of the best I have had in a long time. The fries were mushy and slightly undercooked. I had a bite of my friends pork rib and found it quite tasty. Very meaty and tender and very messy-just like a good rib should be. I did over hear from some that the potato salad had way to much mustard.

Service…
Our server was dressed in mostly tattoos and piercings, very little else. Service was attentive, fast, and friendly.

Atmosphere…
If you can get past the feeling of eating in your garage then I think you just might enjoy this place. We sat in a newer section where the pool tables and stage were. A very interesting mix of people were scattered about talking, drinking, playing pool. Lots of bikers and country folk. All very nice people. Lots of smoking as well so if you are sensitive to smoke then perhaps you should stay away. I came home smelling like a night out at the clubs. The band was excellent and covered a lot of Johnny Cash.

Food: 2.5
Service: 4.0
Atmosphere: 3.5
Health Score: I am pretty sure they don’t care

http://www.therattlesnakeinn.com/

6060 Hwy 195
Florence, TX 76527

Gastroenteritis…

Poor little Moses got sick. Poor little Moses pooped all over the house. Poor little Moses started bleeding from behind. Not good. He was lethargic and not eating. Apparently when he gets sick he gets in the bathtub. This was a good thing. I went to take a shower one morning and when I pulled the curtain back I could not help but notice the blood bath. The shower looked like a ritual sacrifice had occurred. So Moses was taken to the vet. He was severely dehydrated. So fluids and meds were given and he is perfectly fine now. He had Gastroenteritis which refers to the inflammation of the gastrointestinal tract and resulting in acute diarrhea. Not fun stuff people, not fun stuff.

In The Best Interest Of The Child...

Such a heartwarming tale of two loving parents…

http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/15851207/detail.html

Been Away...

Sorry I have been away and haven’t post much of anything lately. Things have been incredibly busy for me but now I am back! I will start posting again soon!

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Yipes...

When I was 13 I was playing with my Legos and watching Punky Brewster. This 13 year old is just pimpin’:

http://www.wfaa.com/sharedcontent/dws/wfaa/latestnews/stories/wfaa080324_wz_teenpimp.2278d8a4.html

JK Rowling didn't kill herself...

This just really ticks me off. It is not that she had thoughts of killing herself rather, it is the fact she felt (or the media felt) it necessary to tell the world about it. Does anyone really care that the wealthiest woman in The United Kingdom wanted to end her life years ago while incredibly poor and depressed? What does it matter now? She obviously did not fling herself off a bridge and I would say that she has done well for herself these days. I just don’t understand? Why bring it up now? There is absolutely no reason to. Is she looking for sympathy? Awwwww, poor JK! Poor thing was penniless and depressed, lets all feel sorry her! What the hell ever. She certainly got over it.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Forkboy on Easter Brunch...

Our good friend Michael threw a great brunch yesterday for his friends. I, personally, drank my weight in mimosas! We all chipped in and brought food and adult beverages. I made a cherry tomato salad with onion, basil, and feta. I also prepared a fabulous super gay blood orange and fennel salad with lemon vinaigrette. It was super good!!

Michael recently purchased the cutest house ever in Lakewood near White Rock Lake.

The food…
What I brought was, of course, excellent! Unfortch I cannot, in detail, remember what was all there. Due to the never-ending mimosa glass that was only empty once I cannot fully remember what all was there and who brought what dish. Over all the food was great!!

The Service…
The service was buffet style.

The Atmosphere…
Set in a 1950’s home that was very tastefully furnished. Everyone mainly hung out on the sizable deck in the back yard. Great friends and great food make for the perfect atmosphere!

Food: 5.0
Service: NA
Atmosphere: 5.0
Health Score: NA

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

American Airlines now offering in-flight happy endings….

OMG! I about DIED when I read about this. Just imagine waking up with spooge in your hair and a creepy dude jacking off while looking at you while in flight. D-I-S-G-U-S-T-I-N-G!!!! My question is did he finish and then start over? She woke up with DNA in her hair and he was still choking the chicken. I just cannot imagine anything like this happening (unless perhaps the story that LaNita told me about their subway ride the other day). Just GROSS!

http://startelegram.typepad.com/sky_talk/2008/03/woman-files-law.html

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Ford Ad...

Sometimes I really love commercials and then sometimes I am like WTF? I have actually cried at a few American Airlines commercials and one Jeep commercial (then I went out and purchased a Jeep). Anyway, I came across this ad for a Ford Fusion. I love the ad but wtf? I would expect this from Jaguar or Mercedes Benz but from Ford? Ford just does not evoke passion or intrigue like this ad suggests. It is like putting a Picasso in a Double Wide. Click the link to watch:

http://www.adgabber.com/video/video/show?id=546804%3AVideo%3A85969

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Forkboy on Grotto Ristorante...

Update: 7/15/2008 Grotto is closed.

Last night I and the Mr. dined at Grotto Ristorante in Uptown on McKinney Ave. I had always wanted to try it but it took a birthday dinner to get me there. I also pass by the place every morning on my way in to the office. So I and the Mr. decided to take advantage of the beautiful evening and take the M Line Streetcar to the restaurant. My first impression was “wow, what a huge bar!” The place just seemed to pull you in and welcome you. Grotto used to be independent but is now apart of the Landry’s chain.

The Food…
The menu reminded me somewhat of the long lost and severely missed Nero’s Italian on Lower Greenville. Dishes like Paglia e Fieno, Fra Diavolo, a great wine list, exceptional deserts really brought back fond memories of my favorite Dallas restaurant. The gigantic menu held a bevy of Italian staples. The Mr. had a Pizza Margherita (9.95). This pizza was about the size of a medium Pizza Hut pizza. Very thin crust with basil, roma tomatoes, and fresh mozzarella. It was delicious. We often forget that pizza should be simple, easy, and not loaded down with a bunch of crap that is going to give you heart burn later. I was really in the mood for soup and decided on the Zuppa Mariata (5.95), aka “traditional wedding soup.” This was a blend of chicken broth, chicken meatballs, Italian greens, carrots, tomatoes, celery, and pasta served with a garnish of rustic bread. If there was chicken meatballs in this soup then I certainly wasn’t able to taste them or even find them. I didn’t send it back since I was at a table of twelve and did not want to be difficult. The soup was ok even without the chicken. The carrots and celery had a nice crunch to them, although I would have preferred them to be a bit more cooked. I think a hint of cilantro would have really brought out the flavors of the broth and greens. The soup was just "ok." The wine we had was very good. I had a Cartlidge & Brown Pinot Noir. I found it to be worth the $9 per glass fee. This wine was incredibly smooth and mild and just a delight to drink. The Mr. had the Red Diamond Merlot and it was equally as pleasing. I am not a huge fan of merlot but I liked this one. Not to heavy and overbearing. Next time I will skip the soup for a pasta dish-probably the Paglia e Fieno. We all passed around deserts. I highly recommend the cheese cake-it was like butta!!

The Service…
The wait staff was all pleasant and knowledgeable. For twelve people our waiter was good and no mistakes were made. I loved the fact that black cloth napkins were used. I hate white napkins. The waiter also refolded the napkin if you got up.


The Atmosphere…
The space is open and large but very inviting. The bar is at the front of the house and is a huge piece of black granite with mahogany everywhere. There is also a small area with a few tables and a roaring fireplace. And with the lights as dim as they were I just wanted to snuggle up near the fire. We sat by the open kitchen. Usually this would annoy me but not this time. The kitchen is separated by glass. I could see the chefs flipping their creations over an open flame. It was all fun to watch. Over all I was impressed with everything but the soup. I will definitely be going back.


Food: 3.5
Service: 4.5
Atmosphere: 4.0
Health Score: 90 (very good) as of 1/23/08

Grotto Ristorante
2222 McKinney Ave.
Dallas, Tx 75201

http://www.grottorestaurants.com/

The Tooth Fairy...

I came across an article today on the Tooth Fairy and the value of teeth. It got me thinking about when I was little. When I lost a tooth I would carefully place it under my pillow and would awake to a shiny silver dollar. I would be so excited. My mother would then tell me that she would keep it in a special place because silver dollars are special and should never be lost or spent. I believed her and handed over my silver dollar for safe keeping. Every time I lost a tooth I would get yet another shiny silver dollar and my mother would put it away for me. This went on for a while, at least until I lost my baby teeth. I was a fool. You see I would forget about the silver dollars. I knew they were kept in my mother’s bedroom, I even knew where, but I never though anything of it. Not until years later did I realize that both my brother and I had been taken for a ride. My mother was using the same silver dollar for each tooth. That woman owes me at least six or seven dollars.

Read the article here:
http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/wayoflife/03/12/toothfairy.economics/index.html

What a Sleeze...

By now I am sure ya’ll have all heard about New York Governor Eliot Spitzer and his expensive little habit of ordering hookers at a cost of $5,500 an hour. This man has had an incredibly distinguished career of fighting corruption, injustice, organized crime, and yes he has been very successful in fighting prostitution rings. Jay Leno said it best: “Spitzer brought prostitution to its knees one girl at a time.” I have never understood why people who make the laws feel that they are above those laws. And why do the wives of these Politician’s stand by their men? Mrs. Spitzer looks incredibly PISSED in the pictures she has taken with her husband since the news broke. I saw an interview with her online. She was giving a tour of the Gov’s Mansion and she seems very cool and actually kinda hot! She needs to dump his ass and get her a 25 year old and write herself a book—she could make a fortune on top of the fortune she would take from her sleazy husband!!

Gas Prices...

It seems that gas prices in Dallas have now reached about 3.69 for regular unleaded gasoline! And oil has reached an unheard of, until now, price of $109 per barrel. I am so happy that I take DART. If you are looking for cheap gas prices around the area then check out this website : http://www.dallasgasprices.com. If you would like to learn more about DART then go here: www.dart.org.

Southwest Death(Air)lines...

I do not care for SWA. Never have and never will. It seems that the darling of the airline industry has been fined 10 million plus for flying cracked planes while the FAA knew about it. I feel this will get so much worse before getting better. Hopefully this will give a boost to other carriers. Why has the FAA overlooked this? Why has SWA been putting their passengers in danger with cracked fuselages? Read the latest at http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/latestnews/stories/031108dnbussouthwest.3b2e20a.html.

Friday, March 7, 2008

"Git down ta binis..."

Thanks Kevo!!!!! (www.funnytexans.com)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D99NHb6B03s

Bowling...

Yesterday we closed our office early and went bowling. We do this as a chance to chill out with our co-workers and management also likes to think of it as a “team-building opportunity.” Initially I really did not want to go. The weather was bad and getting worse but I went. Free bowling and free beer! So why the heck not? Anyway, we went to 300 in Addison and I must admit that this was the nicest bowling alley ever! I like to bowl but do not always get a chance to do it. I usually suck at it. But yesterday I bowled better than ever. I averaged 110 and had a 152 game!! I was very proud of myself. Today I can hardly move. I am very sore from five games. I guess I should work out more (actually I should start working out period!).

Forkboy on El Fenix...

UPDATED 9/18/2008

El Fenix has been a Dallas institution since 1918. Founded by Mike Martinez Sr., El Fenix is the oldest family-owned Mexican food restaurant in the country. The original location is on McKinney Av. just north of downtown near Victory Plaza. I am convinced that the same people have been working there since 1918. I have been going there since I was a child. I always got the soft cheese tacos. Corn tortillas covered in melted cheese with onions. I thought I was in heaven when that steaming plate was placed in front of me! Ahhh, such fond memories. The formula has not changed much at all. The chips are the same thin and crispy goodness and I am sure that I have consumed about a ton of their salsa. It is so comforting that with all the uncertainty in this world that I can walk into El Fenix and enjoy a meal that hasn’t changed in almost 100 years. Senor Martinez also started the Mexican food revolution when he decided to inject a hint of Texas into his soft cheese tacos by adding Texas chili and hence forth the cheese enchilada came to life. The enchiladas are served with rice and beans. I have never been a fan of Mexican rice as it tends to be too coarse and dry for my taste. I usually have a bite or two and that is it. The beans are good but not my favorite. I prefer my beans a little more blended and smooth. A black bean substitution would be nice.

The Food:
The tortilla soup is seriously the best! But what brings me back every week is the Wednesday special. Two cheese enchiladas, rice, and beans all for $4.99!!! Add a few margarita’s and some good friends and you have yourself a great night in store! The enchiladas are just basic corn tortillas with cheese and onions and covered in chili. Just good old-fashioned down home Mexican cooking. Healthy? Of course not. The food sitting on that plate is simply a lovely mirage for the pound of lard that awaits ingestion. I don’t care. It is good and everyone else thinks so as well. There are many other dishes on the menu that I could try but why would you? The special and the soup are the best ever!

The Atmosphere:
The establishment is old and there are pictures of dead relatives hanging all over the place. There are ancient newspaper clippings about El Fenix hanging around as well. There really isn’t that much to the place except it just feels kind of homey and relaxed. Everyone eats there from the poorest to the wealthiest of Dallasites.

The Service:
Many of the wait staff have been working there since the dawn of time. Prompt and friendly service is standard. On Wednesday the special is served just as soon as you order it. Nothing fancy at all.

Food: 1.0
Service: 4.5
Atmosphere: 3.5
Health Score: 97 (very good)

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Snow in Dallas...

I am sure that Wal-Mart is cleaned completely out of food. The mere mention of the word "snow" or, even worse, "ice" makes people around here crazy. They immediately run out to Wal-mart or other stores and stock up like the end of the world is coming. If this was Fargo I could see the justification to stocking up but this is Dallas. The snow, if it even sticks, will be gone in a day. Ice stays around a little longer but still.......there is no reason to stock up with 10 loaves of bread and 8 gallons of milk. If you don't believe me....go to you local grocery store and check out the bread isle.

Slow the Fuck Down...

Last night a small dog was hit by a taxi in front of my building. My first reaction was to kill the taxi driver but it seems that the leash that was on the dog broke. So really it was not the taxi’s fault at all. The reason for my initial reaction towards the driver was that it seems Jackson St is the new Autobahn. People speed down the street like they are fleeing some sort of global catastrophe. There is a crosswalk with a one measly flashing yellow light. Hardly anyone pays any attention. The area is heavily populated with residents and thousands work in the adjoining AT&T towers. I am surprised that a person has not been hit yet. Give it time…I am sure it will happen. There is no reason to drive so fast. If anyone is going to hit someone it will most likely be a valet. I think I might start a petition for a speed bump at Jackson and Browder. If you live and /or work in the area and agree then send me an email!!!

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

March 4th Primary...

Don't forget to vote today!

Monday, March 3, 2008

Forkboy on Urban Cafe...

Urban Café began about two and a half years ago. It shares the first floor with a bar and Urban Market at the Interurban Building in Downtown Dallas. Coincidentally I live in the same building six floors up. The convenience factor is off the chart! If I am hungry or want a drink and just want to hang out then I head downstairs to Urban Café (usually the bar area). The Café has seen its share of managers and chefs. There has always been a hint of instability in the restaurant but that seems to have changed with the new management. The food is comfortable with a hint of southwest and tex-mex. This is evident in the fire roasted tomato salsa, fresh guacamole, and queso offerings. The nachos are wonderful. A huge pile of hot, thin tortilla chips with all the fixins including creamy refried beans.

The menu really has not changed all that much from the time the café opened. There is a Sunday brunch that is decent. I am particularly fond of the biscuits and gravy. Big ol’ biscuits with sausage cream gravy. Order the gravy on the side because you will get more. My opinion is that the gravy should completely cover the biscuits. Overall….very tasty. There used to be a kids menu that I miss greatly! The fried chicken fingers were the best ever!!

Breakfast:
The breakfast tacos are a favorite among the downtown crowd. I particularly like the basic bacon, egg, and cheese taco. American cheese, eggs (scrambled soft), and thick cut bacon. The thick slices of bacon make the taco! I also like the potato egg and cheese taco. There is a chorizo taco that is good but does not set well with my tummy. All tacos are $1.99 and are served with salsa.

Lunch/Dinner:
There is a great selection of salads and sandwiches available. My favorite is the 3-Layer Club (7.95). Fresh bread and great meat (they only use Boar’s Head). It is just a good sandwich, period. I was less than impressed with the Texas Cheese Steak Sandwich (7.95). It was ok but had more peppers than it needed (actually there should not be any peppers on it) and the roast beef seems far to dry. The only redeeming quality was the pepperjack cheese. The salads are huge and in my opinion count as a meal just by themselves. Stay away from the Taco Salad (6.95). It is super greasy. I am not a fan of the Black Bean Corn Relish that is mixed into it. The corn just seems completely out of place and tasted odd to me. More substantial offerings include the quesadilla’s (6.95-7.95) and the chicken fried steak (8.95). The best quesadilla on the menu is the Spicy Chicken Chipotle with grilled chipotle chicken, poblano peppers, onions, cheese, and jalapeños. This dish has some major kick and if you have heart burn issues then you might want to take your meds before ordering this. I order it without the poblano peppers because they tend to talk back to me within an hour or so (if you know what I mean…). Without the peppers, the dish is very enjoyable and still spicy and juicy. The crown jewel of southern cooking, specifically Texas, is the coveted Chicken Fried Steak. The CFS is so important that magazines run CFS specials (D Magazine just ran their CFS edition a few months ago). The best CFS is at the original Black Eyed Pea on Cedar Springs Rd. Urban Café’s CFS is fairly close in my opinion. Their CFS is a large and thick piece of meat surrounded by a golden brown crust. The steak is so tender that you don’t need a knife. Nothing gets on my nerves more than when a CFS is served with a tiny bit of gravy. I do not want to see my CFS. All I want to see is the gravy covering the CFS. So order the gravy on the side as you tend to get more gravy that way. The CFS also comes with toast and mashed potatoes that look like they belong on an elementary school plate (think ice cream scoop shape). They are a bit dry so cover them with gravy and all will be good. I would like to see Texas Toast instead of the whimpy slices of toasted white bread. Again, cover those in gravy as well! Over all the food is decent and the atmosphere is great. A large open space with lots of natural light greets you when you walk in. You can sit and watch the passers-by in comfort. There is also free wi-fi available.

Service:
There is none. You place your order at the counter and take a vibrating thingie and find a table (think Café Express). The vibrating thingie starts vibrating and you go up and get your food. Very easy and quick.

Food: 3.0
Service: NR
Atmosphere: 4.0
Health Score: 91 (very good)

Urban Cafe
1500 Jackson St.
Dallas, Tx 75201
http://urbancafedallas.com/

A Rough Landing...

ok, planes should never land sideways.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/europe/03/03/germany.plane/index.html

Cooking with Karen...Test...and Intro

This is a test video and a small intro.  The audio is a bit odd so I will be playing around with that for now.  And the jingling you hear at the beginning and end is Moses.  I will need to take his tags off during production.  I need a theme song.......any ideas????



Sunday, March 2, 2008

Forkboy on Taco Diner...

Ok, I said my first review was going to be Urban Cafe. I changed my mind. Last night Ron and I took the train to Target to buy a hack saw. But on our way back down to the depths of the underground station I thought it would be a swell idea to go and get some gelato at Paciugo in The West Village. The weather was fabulous and everyone was out. We had our ice cream and decided to take the M-Line Trolley back downtown. While waiting for the trolley we could smell the aromas from Taco Diner. So we decided to have dinner there. I had never eaten there and was looking forward to it since all I ever hear are great things. The place was packed both inside and outside. One thing about Dallas....good weather=a packed patio. We ended up eating inside. Ron went in and ordered us margarita's on the rocks while we waited.

Our table was now ready. The inside of the restaurant was very simple and bright. White leather booths and white tables. The music was a bit loud but the tunes were great so I didn't really mind that much. Of course, chips and salsa were brought to the table. The chips were ok, I have had better. They were a bit thick with an uneasy crunch. My first reaction was that they had been sitting out way to long. Two different styles of salsa were available. A red salsa made from charred tomatoes, jalepeno's, and garlic. It was good. The second salsa was FABULOUS! Salsa Avocate is a pale green, room temperature salsa made from avocado's, lime juice, and chili's. I wish I had asked to take some home. It is not very spicy and has the consistency of a slightly thickened soup. Absolutely the best, non-texas style, salsa I had ever had the pleasure of consuming.

The Margarita's:
There are all kinds of different Margarita's available. In my opinion any Mexican or Tex-Mex establishment should focus on their house margarita instead of the froo-froo crap some places like to call their speciality. Taco Diner's house Rita on the rocks (with salt) was excellent. Served in a tall glass this Rita was so smooth and did not have that shock of acid with each sip. I think that a house Rita at $8 is a little steep but it was so good I didn't care. We both had two each!

The food:
Of course I wanted to try the tacos. For $9.45 you get four tacos and rice. The tacos come wrapped in corn tortillas. The meat is inside the tortilla and you put it together yourself. Let me tell ya.....this ain't Taco Bell! I ordered two Carne Bistec (grilled steak with olive oil and garlic) and two Puerco al Pastor (pork loin marinated in achiote citrus marinade). The Bistec was tender and cooked perfectly. Although I would liked to have tasted a skosh more garlic. The Puerco seemed a little overdone but still was tasty. The use of garlic and citrus though is perfect for pork.

The service:
The restaurant was PACKED! But our wait was only about 10 minutes. I would like to have sat outside but thought that it would have been a much longer wait. The service was good. Even thought the place was full the waiter answered my questions and was attentive. Most importantly...he left us alone.

Overall, Taco Diner was a great dinner. I will certainly be going back.

Food: 3.0 on a scale of 1-5
Service: 3.5
Atmosphere: 3.0
Health Score:* 90 (very good)
*Health scores are provided by the City of Dallas

I need to find some tiny fork symbols and yes I used the word skosh.
Taco Diner
3699 McKinney Avenue Suite 307
Dallas, Tx

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Cooking with Karen...

I love cooking shows and have always wanted to have my own.  With my Mac and iMovie now I can!!!  I have decided to start my own show in my own kitchen.  The name of the show will be Cooking With Karen.  The reason I am calling it that is because my friends call me Karen.  As in Karen Carpenter since I am so skinny.  They tell me to eat a sandwich.  Anyway, I thought that would be the perfect name.  So I will soon be posting a video blog once I learn how to edit on iMovie.  Basically I will be using the camera on my Mac to record the cooking and I can use iMovie to edit for time and content and also add music and credits!!  I hope to have something posted by the end of next week.  

Forkboy...

While I was in college and living on campus I ate most of my meals in the crapateria.  During my stint there management erected a cork board and solicited for comments.  From this Forkboy was born.  I became the Midwestern State food critic.  Oh how I wish I had saved my commentary--journalism gold I tell you!!  GOLD!  

Anyway, I love to eat out and try new restaurants.  I have been somewhat bad about trying new places lately but hope to try something new every week.  For now I will comment on places that I have already tried.  So I am, henceforth, bringing Forkboy back from the dead.  The posting will be Urban Cafe so look for this in a day or so.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Check this site out...

You know everyone loves a good story about some of the idiots and issues here in our great State of Texas. You should head over to my friend Kevan’s blog and read all about it.

http://www.funnytexans.com/

Sopapeople...

On Wednesday nights we go to El Fenix for the Wednesday special. $4.99 for 2 enchiladas, rice, and beans. A few margaritas and good company. El Fenix is, I believe, the oldest Mexican food restaurant in Dallas. It opened in 1906 and I think the same people are still working there. Anyway, on the menu are Sopapeople (think Sopapillas). The menu describes them as “shaped like kids (with honey)” and for $4.75 you get an order of 5 kids or a single kid for $1.75.

Pervs.

Thursday...

Thursday’s suck. I say this because it is true. They just blow! It is very difficult for me to get up. All I want to do is stay in bed on Thursday mornings and sleep. And I am in an instant bad mood because I have to get up.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

White Trash at it again...

OMG! Have you seen this? Southwest was apparently rude to these girls. It seems that they were causing a ruckus on board-talking loud, swearing, annoying the people around them. So much so that they were escorted off the plane after it landed by 4 police officers.

The girls claim that they were being discriminated against because they were too pretty. WTF?? These white trash whores think they are pretty? They are just way to full of themselves.

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2008/02/25/porter.too.pretty.to.fly.wtsp

Ordering Checks...

The only thing I use checks for are the following: rent and utilities, parking, and the occasional magazine subscription. I am running low on checks currently. So I call Chase to order checks and was told that because I just changed my address that I had to go in person to a branch and order them. Are you fucking kidding me!? I about ate the guys face through the phone when he told me “those are the rules.” He said that it is fraud prevention. I informed him that it was convenience prevention. I even played the employee card and he said no. Useless sons-of-bitches!!!! So now I have to go to a branch which all close before I get home. Guess I will have to wait until Saturday. I am just pissed.

Monday, February 25, 2008

The Cool ATM...

Disclaimer: I am not promoting J.P. Morgan Chase Bank…I might be an employee and a customer but I am just saying I found a cool Chase ATM

I needed to make a deposit and did not want to wait until Monday. The bank was already closed so I decided to make the deposit through the ATM. You hear these horror stories where people make a deposit using an ATM and their funds are not available for like 10 days. Luckily Chase works a little different. Once you make a deposit then there is an amount available immediately then it takes 1-2 business days for the rest to clear. About the same amount of time as using a teller. I went to the Chase branch downtown located at Pacific and Ervay. I walked up to the machine and was looking for the envelopes. There were none to be found. The machine said I could make a deposit so I continued to follow the instructions on the screen. It told me to just stick the check into the slot. OMG! You did not have to use an envelope. I didn’t even need to key in the amount that I was depositing. So I place the check into the machine. It scanned the check and brought up a perfect picture of the check and asked if the amount XXX.XX was ok. I was giddy. I pushed yes and the check was deposited with part of it immediately available for withdrawal. How cool is this!!!!???? No envelopes! Not to mention that I have my ATM preferences set. So when I go to any Chase ATM in the world the preferences that I setup will automatically pop up on the screen. I have another deposit I need to make this evening and can’t wait to use that ATM!!!

I know this is all just trivial but I just thought it was all just too cool.

Friday, February 22, 2008

Death Threat Elmo...

I SO want this doll!!!!!

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/us/2008/02/22/delaney.death.threat.elmo.cnn

The Bath...

Last night was cold and wet. I thought that I would just chill and I did. I decided that a nice hot bath would be excellent. So I turned on the water and added some bubbles. I went into the kitchen briefly. A few moments later I noticed that there was water on the floor in the living room and kitchen. It could not have been the tub as the water was concentrated in tiny puddles on the floor. I thought that I probably had tracked the water in since I had just taken Moses out. So I undress and walked into the bathroom. I noticed water on the floor in the bathroom and bedroom. Curious I called for Moses. He came and looked at me then ran. I finally caught him and he was soaked. Apparently he had decided to take a swim in the tub as it was filling. I toweled him dry and proceeded with my bath. Moses stood right there and watched me. He was acting like he was going to jump in. Then I did it. I put him in the bath with me. Oh he loved it! He just sat there while I chilled. Afterwards I took a quick shower to rinse off (you should always shower after a bath since you are just marinating in your own dirt and oils!) and gave Moses a full wash and fluff. I still can’t believe that I did that. But I used to have a cat that would like to shower with me in college. I have odd animals. What can I say?

Amy Winehouse...

I have been listening to Back In Black by Amy Winehouse. I know that she has been all over the news with winning grammys and her major drug problem but her music and her voice are amazing. I was reading Perezhilton.com and there was a YouTube posting of a live performance of Love is a Loosing Game (fabulous song!). Although the performance was a little off and she was a bit difficult to watch I was intrigued. I found the actual music video and was really just blown away. So I highly recommend listening to her stuff. The only song of hers I had heard before was Rehab. Wasn’t a fan. But after listening to the rest….it is really cool and different.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

New Pics After the Move...


Not sure why the preview is STILL not appearing but just click the box and it will work.

Monday, February 18, 2008

The Move is Done…

Well, we finished moving finally. The entire process went much quicker that I had thought. Most of everything was moved on Friday and I finished up on Sunday. Mainly organizing and taking stuff down to storage. The apartment looks great! I will get pictures posted soon. Now, we are in the process of getting Ron’s things into the place. He doesn’t really have all that much. He is selling his sofa and TV stand (I think) and his bed is going into storage. He is bringing things over everyday so hopefully this will all be done very soon.

I have been franticly organizing things. I cannot sleep until things are done. I lay awake at night organizing things in my head. Ron sat me down in a futile attempt to calm/slow me down but all I could look at was the kitchen in shambles. I was up until midnight last night finishing the bathroom, closet, and bookcases. The task has been completed. It actually looks like I have lived there a while. It has come to my attention that I have to many clothes. When I had my nice big walk-in closet it certainly did not seem like much. But as I was organizing the new closet I quickly came to realize that I should put some stuff away. I have almost 20 pairs of shoes; each in their own plastic containers that did not fit well in the closet with my clothes. So, I took a bunch of summer clothes and folded them which helped tremendously. So now all the pants are hanging on the bottom level with the shoes stacked neatly. We will have to add another drawer. I fold my t-shirts in a very odd way that saves a ton of space. I have started folding Ron’s t-shirts the same way. Here is the problem-Ron wears a large-XL shirt. When I fold his shirts the same way it is still very big so I folded the shirts in half again and bingo! Plenty of room. But I know there is more to come as he has not moved the majority of his clothes yet.

So far so good and more to come…

Perhaps it is Time to Leave JPMorgan Chase & Co…

I have the most boring job ever! All I do is surf the internet and write blogs at work. I need to seriously get out of here and start on something else. Yes, I can wear whatever I want. Yes, I get fed everyday. But I would rather dress up and pay for my own lunches and work than sit on my ass all day. I started at FCS in July and told myself that I would commit to 1 year of service. Well I have about 5 months to go. I will, however start looking and if something great comes my way then who am I to turn it down!

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Republican...

I am not an out spoken political person at all. I keep my political views to myself. It is a private matter for me. For some reason I ended up a registered Republican. I have no clue as to how this may have occurred. Every so often I will get an 8x10 glossy of President Bush and his lovely wife Laura. This disturbs me greatly. I would rather just have a picture of Laura but no, darned ol’ Bushy has to jump into the picture. I wish I knew how I ended up a registered Republican, I really do. How do I go about changing this? I feel unclean. I feel the need to bathe in holy water but am afraid I my skin might fall off do to my sinful ways. Ugh.

Anyway, I thought it funny that “informed voters” were headed to the polls during Super Tuesday two weeks ago. The Texas primary is not until March 4th. People were complaining that there were no candidates on the ballots. Well of course not you yahoos. If you had been informed as much as you say you were then you would have known. There was an election on that day but it was for state and city-wide issues.

Pics of a Work in Progress...





Just click on the blue question mark and it will take you to some pictures. I need to figure out how to load a preview. BUT, the link works-promise!!

Seamless Moving...

Today is Monday and I am just now starting to pack some things up for my move on Friday.  I am only going up two floors in the same building so I am not going to beat myself up packing everything.  All I need is some totes and a few boxes and I will be good to go.  The kitchen will go first.  I will get it in there and all put away then the bathroom will be next.  Then the closet.  Then the big pieces of furniture.  By the time we are finished the new place will look as if I have lived there for a while.  It is what I like to call seamless moving.  I will probably start moving things Thursday evening.  We finished painting and assembling the closet over this past weekend.  Ron had the easy part with rolling the paint on the walls.  I did all the taping and edging.  I am so sore I can hardly move.  The colors are as follows:  the living room is "Oak Cask" or as Bill said-manilla envelope, the kitchen is "Chasing Chocolate," the bathroom is "Subtle Blue," and the bedroom is "Smoky Blue (think slate blue)."  Ugh, the gays and their colors schemes!  Well, it all looks great and I will get some pics posted soon.  

Friday, February 8, 2008

Valentine's Day...

Every year on February 14th people, men mostly, are reminded that they must acknowledge their love for their loved one by spending cash. Buying candy and flowers, diamonds, etc. Wouldn’t an “I Love You” suffice? Ron and I discussed VD and thank goodness we both hate it. There is no reason why we need to prove our love for each other in that way. Especially so soon after Christmas and before our anniversary (March 18th). Honestly I would rather have a Nintendo Wii or shiny Ninja sword than something mushy. So we are opting out of celebrating VD next Thursday.

You know, VD also contributes greatly to obesity. The stores are stocking their shelves with mounds of chocolates and tons of candy. So a day of love really means a day of overeating. “I love you so much I bought you all of this candy, please eat and gain 90lbs.” Then she gains 90 lbs and he runs out and bangs a flight attendant on his way to a conference in Boise. Marriage ruined and it is both of their faults. You never see or hear about a loved one giving their honey a box of granola bars! And why in the hell do people get married on the busiest marriage day of the year? What a cliché! It is all about the romance I guess.

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Polishing a Turd...

There was an article this morning in The Times about businesses in New York City accepting Euros instead of U.S. Dollars. Due to the increasingly weak dollar (which is practically worthless) businesses are struggling. There are businesses here in Texas, some even here in Dallas, that accept Mexican Pesos as well as places along the U.S./Canadian border that accept Canadian Dollars. You know, I am all for this!! I have always believed that a universal monetary system would be much better than the one we have now. Of course, there are people who believe that I am crazy but so be it. I have about £60 and about €25 ($117.00 and $36 respectively) tucked away. There is no point in exchanging them since they have lost more value now from when I bought them.

Of course the U.S. is headed into a recession. Our “Brilliant” President has decided to give Americans more money in early summer. They are trying to prevent a recession. More money given out, the FED keeps lowering the prime interest rates, etc. This is ok to a certain point. I believe some of this is going to far. Recessions are historically cyclical. A recession will happen regardless of the things done to prevent it. They keep skirting the issue here. They are calling this period of time “a slow down in our economy.” Um, right…this is called a recession. It is like polishing a turd. No matter how much you polish the turd, it is still a stinky piece of poo. No matter how much you cover up a recession…it is still a recession. If you look back through history you will find that the economy will enter a mild recession during a presidential election and other times of uncertainty. But I think that this is going to be bigger and last longer than usual. God forbid…don’t use the “R” word.

Ninja Puppy and Kitty Takanawa...




Ok, I have the story going through my head. Moses, my Yorkshire Terrorist, and Ms. Kitty, my elder Tonkanese cat are the main characters. Moses is, of course, Ninja Puppy. Ms. Kitty is the Ninja Master Kitty Takanawa. We will begin with how Ninja Puppy came to be recruited by Kitty Takanawa. This will be the first chapter and I will post it very soon so keep an eye out!

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Winehazard...

If you like wine then you will love my friend and fellow BP's website: http://www.winehazard.com/
Eric's site is informative, stylish, fun, and fabulous. His blog is not one of those haughty critiques of over-priced wine. The wines are inexpensive and easily attainable from any wine store, online, and your local supermarket. He provides in-depth and honest reviews of wine. He is not a professional Sommelier or wine expert. He is simply providing his opinion. It just so happens that he has a good palate and great taste so I faithfully endorse winehazard as a go to to learn, experiment, and enjoy tasteful commentary and great wines. So go and visit winehazard and enjoy!!!!

Bad Wine...


Last night I forgot I had been given a bottle of wine a few weeks ago. I opened it and allowed to breathe a little. I poured a glass. It was a 2007 Georges Duboeuf Beaujolais Nouveau. The color was light, it swirled ok. Then I smelled it. It smelled acidic, almost like athlete’s foot. I was like, YIPES!! I put the glass down and picked up the bottle. I looked at the cork and it was fine. I did notice that the bottle itself seems light and almost felt like plastic. I had to tap on it just to confirm. The glass itself seemed very thin. So, after about 15 minutes I picked up the glass again. Same smell. So I take a sip and I thought my face was going to collapse into itself (think bitter beer face). Now, I love wine and I have a decent palate I think but what the hell?? I was against throwing it out-no need to waste alcohol. I placed an ice cube in the glass and waited a sec. I had a piece of cheese and a cracker. My attempt to make this palpable was futile. I was able to finish the glass thinking that I would find a redeeming quality but no. I dumped the wine down the sink which was a first for me. It took me back to my college days drinking boxed wine. Well, let me tell you that any variety of Franzia is far better that what I attempted to consume last night. Maybe it was just me? Perhaps someone out there will love it? Maybe it needed to sit on the shelf for a few years? Well, for what it was worth it went down the sink better than it did my throat.

Friday, February 1, 2008

Another Crappy Rant...

This morning, like all mornings, I rise to a new day. New experiences to have, new people to meet. But the first thing I do is take Moses out. He was still asleep when I got up so I dressed and got ready for work. Then I took him outside so that he may do his business. He did and we came back inside and I left for the office. Half way to the office I noticed something on my pants. It was poop. I looked at my shoe and there, suck to the bottom and side of my shoe, was dog crap. When I got to the office I washed my shoe in the sink and tried to wash out the crap on my pants. All that did was make for wet and poopy pants. Did I mention it stunk to high heaven? It did. So I waited until the mall opened and purchased a pair of jeans and new shoes. Now damnit! Why in the hell can’t people pick up after their dogs? The City of Dallas has made it a law that you must pick up the poo! Unfortunately there is no one around to enforce the law. There are even poo bags at the poopoo palace where I take Moses. Some will argue that I should watch where I step and I usually do but come on! If you can’t pick up after your dog then you should not have one! There should be camera's on the poopoo palace and thank goodness I work above the Galleria!

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

A Rant...

I was walking Moses last night before heading to bed when a homeless man approached me and asked for change. I told him no and that I did not have any spare change-which was the truth. He asked again and I gave him a firm NO. Then he said that I took better care of my dog than I do of human beings. I responded that he was not my responsibility and walked away. In a way he is right. We do take better care of our animals than we do of humanity. But his homelessness is not my problem. It is not my fault that he is on the streets. I have no idea how this man got to where he is now and in a way I don’t care. He makes this my problem when he asks for money. I have lived downtown for a long time and have gotten pretty good at determining the true homeless/sick. He may have looked the part but he certainly had not missed a meal. This man is living on the streets and has the audacity to judge me? I don’t think so. He even said that God would judge me in the end. I am not really worried about my judgment day. I never feel bad when I refuse to shell out; that is what my tax dollars are for. I would rather buy the guy a hamburger than give out cash. But they never want food just money. He just pissed me off and the fact that it did piss me off just pissed me off even more.

Monday, January 28, 2008

Motel Hell and a Great Steak...

This past Thursday I traveled to Wichita Falls, Tx for yet another funeral. All the reputable hotels in WF were booked. So finally we found the Econo Lodge. The Econo Lodge makes the Motel 6 look like the Ritz Carlton. We were tired and just decided to settle. After all it was just one night. We had a box of wine (I know that is soooo wrong but I din’t bring it and it travels easy) so we didn’t care at this point. I knew this was going to be bad when the key cards they gave us were actually coupons for Pizza Hut. We drove over to the room to find it was on a corner-that is always a plus. We use our Pizza Hut keys and walked in. The room was about the same temperature inside as it was outside-34 degrees with a wind chill of 14. I immediately turn on the heater. The room itself was like any standard hotel room. Table and two chairs, two full sized beds, a dresser, TV, small fridge, and bathroom. The color scheme was blue and burgundy. The patterned wallpaper resembled that of an old western whore house. The bed pillows were as flat as a pancake. I knew I would not be sleeping on 350 count Egyptian Cotton sheets so I sucked it up. The bed spread was also a blue and burgundy with a paisley swirl. I was secretly hoping that the bed would vibrate but no suck luck. So we settled in and decided to head out for dinner at McBride’s Land and Cattle-an institution of Wichita Falls. The restaurant was so warm, fireplace roaring. We were seated by a lovely buxom youngin hostess. We both ordered the petite sirloin medium rare. I had a Caesar. OMG is was the best Caesar ever. Then the steak came. Perfect choice of meat wrapped in bacon, a baked potato cooked to perfection. After asking for extra butter for my potato I loaded it full of cheese, bacon bits, and chives. I also ordered the house red which was sooo good and smooth and served at the correct temperature. The steak was so tender. I ate every bite and cleaned my plate. The bill was a pleasant surprise. A meal like this in Dallas would have been at least $50-75. Not in Wichita Falls. The meal was $14 each. The wine was 3.95 and we had 3 glasses between us. Total bill: $40. Can’t beat that! Then we braved the cold and went back to that motel. We had more wine and chatted. I was surprised to find that there was free wi-fi. Then off to bed. Around 3:30am we woke up to the yelling of a woman next door. She was saying “I am NOT YOU FUCKING WHORE.” She repeated this several times and then continued to laugh until about 4:15am. It didn’t matter. I did not get any sleep anyway with the thought of bed bugs and the lack of neck support due to a flat pillow. That morning we decided to head over and partake in the free breakfast. We dressed for a funeral mind you. We walk in and everyone turns around. We grab a donut and a diet coke, turned in our Pizza Hut keys and left immediately. For 45 dollars, the Econo Lodge is exactly what you would expect for that price. I am just glad to be back in my own bed.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Web Site...

I have changed the web address of this blog to: www.IBelieveInNinjas.com.

You can still access this by the original address but please bookmark the new address for your records.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Pickles...

WTF? Ugh!!! Subway was catered in for our lunch today and everything was smothered in pickles. I HATE pickles with a passion. So I went to Subway and got a pickleless sandwich. The admin saw me with my Subway bag and asked why I went to Subway after she had already ordered it. I firmly informed her that there were pickles all over everything and that the sandwiches, in my opinion, were officially tainted and walked away.

Geography…

When I first started this Ninja blogger I did so to entertain myself and my friends. Well, I decided to keep track of the hits I have been getting. I am not tracking people just how many hits per day and from where. I have readers in Alaska, Indonesia, Australia, the UK, France, Brazil, and other places that really surprised me. I have also gotten a few emails about how much these strangers enjoy my blogs. It is kinda cool that my random musings are being read globally. Spread the word that Ninjas rule!! I need to add a few pictures and such. If there is anything else ya’ll would like to see then please let me know and I will see what I can do to increase your Ninja experience.

Serenity…

A few months ago I came across this website called www.iSerenity.com. It is has sounds of ambient noise to sooth and relax. You can select airplane, summer evening, city sounds, fan, thunderstorm, ect. It is very nice tool to relax and/or tune out your coworkers and office noise. I love this site and highly recommend it.

Library Thrills...

The internet is relatively inexpensive. Computers are also relatively inexpensive. I completely understand if you simply cannot afford either. You can go to an internet café or even Kinkos to use the internet. The public library is also a nice place to go and it is completely free. Completely free to visit websites that feature porn. While little Johnny is typing up his research paper you can sitdown next to him and surf bigtitties.com. Just because the access is free does not make it right to access pornographic material in a public library. This is the problem that the J. Erik Jonnson Public Library in downtown Dallas is currently having. While little Sally is researching her science project you can sit next to her and watch videos of amateur glory holes on XTube.com or even search for a date on Classylady.com (where you can find my old neighbor Robynn available for a nominal fee). The City of Dallas and its public library system are trying to figure out a solution to this issue. If the library pulls internet access then the State of Texas will pull its funding. If the library installs filters on the machines then the ACLU steps in to say that access to other vital information such as breast cancer, etc might be blocked because of verbiage or whatever. So how does the library police people beating off under the table to peeonme.com? The librarians are a good start. I am sure it is not easy to approach an individual watching porn and ask them to please not do that. This is a free service that my tax dollars are paying for. I am paying for that creepy old man watching One Night in Paris and that really grosses me out. The library might as well stack Hustler in the magazine rack. I realize that most pornography is not illegal. However, I do strongly believe that it has no place in a public library. Then I think to myself that the library is the last place for censorship. We might as well change the name to the J. Erik Jonnson Bath House and Homeless Shelter. Perhaps they should create a separate room, much like the ‘back room’ of the video store, where one can sit and enjoy their favorite porn sites. I think that is a decent compromise. Either way it seems damned if you do and damned if you don’t.

Monday, January 21, 2008

A Valid ID...

Wednesday morning I woke up with a pounding headache and a sprained foot. I have no clue as to why either occurred but it was what it was. Anyway, I decided to call in to the office and have a mental health day. Well, not 30 minutes after I called in I checked my messages. I had missed a phone call earlier. It was Pam, her father had passed away. I was surprised but not shocked as health issues continued to mount on him. I have known him since I was a baby so I had to go to the funeral. So I called the office back and informed them of the situation. I hung up the phone and booked a flight. Then my mother calls that evening and informs me that my cousin Doris passed away. She had been very sick with cancer. So I scrambled to figure out different flight arrangements as I was intent on going to both funerals. To make a long story short…there was not going to be a funeral. There was going to be a viewing on Friday evening and then a gravesite memorial Saturday in Meadow, TX—an hour north of Lubbock. I thought to myself—sheesh, lots of flying involved. But the weather in that area was very bad. Most of Texas was freezing cold. My mother decided that she would, regrettably, not go to west Texas. I feel really bad about it but decided that I would not travel as well. Doris didn’t want a funeral and people boo-hooing over her. My mom and I will make a trip there once it warms up and we can spend more time there with our family.

So, I booked my flight and packed and was in somewhat of a rush to get things done. I always travel using my passport-even domestically so there are no questions asked-usually. I simply forgot my passport. When I got to the airport I handed over my driver’s license to the TSA guy and he asked if I had my renewal. OOPS! My license had expired last month on my birthday. Completely forgot. I told them that I did not have the renewal. He wrote all over my ticket—SSSS in bold and underline and circles. Well, I am not sure what SSSS stands for but I am almost sure that is one level below a cavity search. Security pulled me aside and went through all my bags and even bomb-tested my shoes. On my return it was the same procedure—SSSS all over the ticket. I wised up this time and decided to check my bag to speed up the process. I had some time to kill so I thought that after a week of death I needed a beer. They asked for my ID and said NO! Since it was expired---no beer. Bastards. So I just had a diet coke and chilled out. I did all of this on a sprained foot. My flights were also at the very last gate on the furthest wing of the airports. I hobbled my way everywhere. Oh well, I am home now.

Friday, January 11, 2008

The Established Bachelor No More...

Well Hell has officially frozen over. For those of you who know me well you know that I like living alone. I like having my privacy and my own space. It is time to grow up. Ron and I have decided that it would be a good idea to move in together. After almost a year of dating I felt it was the next logical step. In the past I would have been incredibly reluctant but not now and not with Ron. It just seems right. His lease is up at the end of March. We have placed a hold on a much larger loft in my building with a March 1st move in. That gives him a month to move his stuff in. I am not nervous really. That night after we decided to do this I could not sleep but now I am just fine and excited. After all this time of waiting and dating and all that crap, I finally found the right person. I know that living together will be challenging and hopefully we will not kill each otherJ This is why we got a loft with a separate bedroom! We are going to repaint the apartment since the building did a shitty job of repainting it. We have about 6 huge windows and 2 sets of French doors that open up to a Juliet balcony in the bedroom. We also have a 180 degree view since the apartment is located on a corner end of the building. The only problem is the closet, or really the lack thereof. We will have to get a closet system from Ikea. I am also gonna have to replace Ron’s plastic hangers with wooden hangers so that there is good closet karma all around! We are going to turn the cubby hole they call a cloest into a pantry/linen closet which will be perfect!!!! Overall we are excited and ready to move.

Friday, January 4, 2008

Oh Hell No...

There was an article in today’s DMN and The New York Times that really pissed me off. Basically a pug dug under the fence and escaped in Dallas. The owners searched and searched with no luck. Then on Wednesday an anonymous letter arrived that stated that the dog was found and given to her daughter as a Christmas present. Enclosed was a $20 bill. WTF!? I would be hunting this woman down with blood-thristy vengeance.

Read the article:
http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/dn/latestnews/stories/010408dnmetstolendog.28a28e1.html

Be sure to read the woman’s letter to the dog owners as well.

This isn’t a childhood game of finders-keepers. Ugh. This will garner a ton of press and someone will come foreword about this. I feel confident that Scooter will be returned.